31

124.4

Sausage egg cheese biscuit 560

Mozzarella 80

Burger 600

Fries 200

Cookie 180

Cookie 250

(1870)

25 min puppy walk

Broccoli & cauliflower with butter & Parmesan 270 (2140)

Evening 126.6

I don't mind having a hungry day, but I wish I hadn't chosen the day before monthly weigh-in! If I puff up tonight (which I may well, as I'm contemplating more food) I'll call it 126, since that's what I am fully fed and hydrated right now.

Barbecue roast beef 210

4 oz dark chocolate mint fudge 480

2830 total calories. I estimated a lot of this and try to round high rather than low, so hopefully it wasn't quite that much. 

30

124.4

3 lb from goal

Triscuits 120

Jalapeño mozzarella 240

Trail mix 560

(920)

30 min puppy walk

29

126.4 but I kinda saw that coming. 

Still crazy thirsty but I'm peeing up a storm too.

Triscuits 180

Chocolate chip cookies 290

Mixed nuts 200 (670)

Coconut roast almonds 250

Chocolate milk 300 (1220)

25 min puppy walk with 3 one-minute runs

28

125.2

Sausage egg & cheese croissant 560

Hash browns 190

Ketchup 30 (780)

Trying to eat more today. Oy, did that breakfast put the numbers high, though.

Triscuits & mozzarella 200

8 pm (980)

I have been unbearably thirsty since the wee hours this morning. I woke up at 5 to a call saying my shift had been canceled. I think I've had 80 oz of Diet Coke and at least 40 oz of water. I'll probably wake up heavier tomorrow as a result, and I shouldn't let it bother me. 

27

125.2

Triscuits & mozzarella 300

Chocolate chip cookies 150

Mixed nuts 200

Raisin bran 500

1150

85 min puppy walk

26

124.4

I was 132.2 last Sunday, which means I lost 7.8 pounds in a week. I've never lost more than 7 in a week before.

I've also never lost more than 10 pounds in one month, and even if I don't lose any more I'm at 11.6 for October. 

Exactly 67 pounds lost. Have not seen this weight since I was 18. 

Triscuits 130

Jalapeño mozzarella 80

Double cheeseburger 430 (640)

60 min puppy walk - the 2.3 mile State Park loop including a 2 minute run!

Broccoli with bleu cheese & bacon 390

Dark chocolate squares 210 (1280)

25 min puppy walk

25

125.4

65.8 lb lost

94% to goal

Bust 33.5

Waist 27.75

Belly pooch 32.75 (a QUARTER INCH from having lost a foot off the biggest part of me)

Hips 37"

Tomato basil Triscuits 260

Jalapeño mozzarella 160

Swedish meatballs 400

Rosemary veggies 200

(1020)

50 min puppy walk and and he got another hour of activity trying to get K's shelties to play with him. 

24

126.4

Hello 90% to goal.

Breakfast burrito 290

Triscuits 120

Jalapeño mozzarella 80

Bean chips 140

(630)

20 min puppy walk

23

Saltines 30

French fries 50

Protein shake 190

(270)

20 minute puppy walk

Butternut squash ravioli 280

Beef blue cheese salad 400

(950)

22

128.8

Bean chips 200

30 minute puppy walk

6:30 pm: that's it, no more food yet, just Diet Coke and a cigarette. And I will probably Benadryl myself to sleep tonight. Fucking Drama Club shit.

I posted a pic to The Storm Is Within about body size, then I panicked that the dressing room mirror might be one of those ones that distort you so you look slimmer. I went to another dressing room today (trying to find required items for improv show costume) and I still can't figure out if my eyes OR my iPhone are capturing my actual size. It's driving me nuttier than I already am. (Will post a few pics to TSIW later)

30 minute puppy walk

(60 min)

Bean chips 280

Salsa 30

Ham 100

(610)

21

129.8

Apparently milkshake dinners are not on the list of things that make me bloat! Or maybe blind rage is a diuretic (see other blog). 

Sausage McMuffin 370

Mcdouble 380

90 minute puppy play date. I wasn't doing much myself, but Xander got an hour and a half of romping with the uncle's dogs and their toys, so happy puppy :)

Sesame stir fry chicken lean cuisine 280 (1030)

M&Ms 500

Bean chips 140

(1670)

20

Mcchicken 390? Don't remember

Protein shake 190

Strawberry chocolate milkshake

Bowl of chili

Lotsa crackers 90

70 min puppy walks incl 2+ mile loop and 1 minute run

19

133.2 NO. BAD SCALE. DOWN. 

Meh. I just wish my belly could make up its mind

Triscuits 370

Protein shake 190

Mozzarella 80

(640)

Yesterday and today are work days I'm going to eat what I need to to keep from dropping! This job is a LOT busier than my last one meaning lots and lots of walking. I'm getting very hungry durin the shifts and I think it's because I'm burning off that much more. 

I'm feeling good physically and am planing another puppy run tomorrow :)

Triscuits 250

Mini cupcake 100

(990)

Bean chips & salsa 310

Wine 100 (1500)

Veggie lasagna 370 (1870)

 Rocky road cupcake 250 (2120)

25 min puppy walk

18

132.4

Breakfast burrito 290

Pepper & olive oil Triscuits 120

Tomato basil Triscuits 130

(540)

Mac n cheese 800

More Triscuits 130 (930)

Spice cake 600 (1530)

Pumpkin spice donut 330

Milk 160 (2010)

25 min puppy walk

17

Raisin bran 390

Roast beef sandwich + horsey sauce 610

Fried mozzarella sticks + marinara 450

(1550)

70 minute 2.3 mile (I think that's how long the loop is, I forget and the State Park map is wrong) puppy walk. This is by far our longest walk! He did really well. 

Bean chips 140

Salsa 30

M&Ms 150

(1870)

30 minute puppy walk

(100 minutes)

Late note: belly unhappy again. Mozzarella sticks???

I put a bunch of Parmesan in last nights Mac n cheese and my tummy got a bit unhappy. Lactose intolerance is kind of a nightmare idea from someone who could live on dairy. Sigh. I may do a trial where I have LACTAID with everything containing dairy and see if it changes anythig. 

Breaking News

130.4 not bad, not bad.

I just realized I am back below 60 pounds lost! 61 as of this morning. I'm also 2.4 lb from being back to 90% to goal.

Although my mind, as always, is chaos ("Weight is down today. I should restrict so it stays that way. No screw it all I'm having half a dozen cupcakes for a snack"), my eating overall has been pretty moderate. I'm not in danger of a crash-and-burn from restricting. I'm... Kind of ok.

In other gigantic news, I remeasured my waist this morning, since I had measured it just after eating last night. 

28"

That's my "You can't possibly be fat if you get back to that number" waist. It's the smallest waist I've had in 11 years. It was my smallest waist the summer before I started blowing up.  I'm wearing "not sick goal" jeans that hung in a dark corner from 2008 to 2013 because getting them up last my knees seemed like a fantasy. 

My waist varies by several inches day to day so it's easy to brush some of that off as "not bloated today." But I've also lost a solid inch and a half from my hips, which do not vary much day to day. This is real loss, real shrinking. But I can't see it. 

That's part of why I've religiously taken progress photos and measurements. Numbers don't lie, even if my eyes do. 

16

129.0 waht

Waist 29" (down 3.5" from 8/4 140 pounds)

Hips 38" (down 1.5" from then)

I'm still eating plenty... Perhaps all the puppy walks are boosting my calorie burn (and insulin sensitivity) more than I dared hope!

Alas, my main cue that this is Real Weight Loss is that my chest is shrinking. Cue body image fuckery.

30 minute puppy walk

Breakfast burrito 290

Protein shake 190 (480)

Carmel sundae 340 (820)

Bacon mcdouble 440 (1260)

I am somewhat bloated and uncomfortable after the sundae & burger. Possible culprits lately are possibly dairy (cottage cheese and now ice cream)?but my belly handles large quantities of milk just fine so lactose intolerance doesn't seem logical. Apart from these few incidents though, my tummy is much, much happier than it has been in a long time. I'm not motivated enough to do specific food trials to see what might be the problem atm though. Job, theater, and puppy are taking up all my energy.  

Squash ravioli 260 (1520)

Bean chips 140 (1660)

Mac n cheese 500 (2160)

15

Rocky road cupcake 250

Milk 180

20 minute puppy walk

It was a midnight snack last night but I'd already posted my intake, so today starts with a high number :/

Bean chips 140 (570)

25 min puppy walk

Bean chips & cheese 220 (790)

Rosemary veg 200

Donut 330

(1320)

15 min puppy walk (60 min)

14

130.0 WHAT? But I'll take it. 

Breakfast burrito 290

Oreos (Halloween ones with orange creme) 280

Salisbury steak pasta broccoli 590

Pumpkin spice donut 330

Milk 180

(1670)

25 min puppy walk including... Drumroll please... One minute puppy run! The walks are mostly casual and low speed, but we did a proper one minute interval run :D

13

132.8

Raisin bran 390

50 minute puppy walk

Rosemary veggies 200

(590)

Pumpkin spic donut 330

Milk 180

(1100)

12

133.4

30 minute puppy walk

Raisin bran 390

40 min puppy walk

15 min puppy walk

Salisbury steak in gravy with whole grain linguine and broccoli 580 (9 g fiber woo)

Garlic bread est 400? Mmm garlicky breath

(1370)

Choco cupcake 250

Milk 120

(1740)

Final 85 min puppy walk

11

My hands are puffy and tight so I refuse to weigh today. 

It will be a naughty day. 

Mac n cheese 700

2 pumpkin spice donuts 660

Rocky road chocolate cupcake 250

Santa Fe rice 290

Bean chips 280

Red wine 150

Milk 240

(2570)

80 min puppy walk

The bean chips are an interesting find! They have 140 cals and 10 g net carbs (5-6 g fiber) per serving. They obviously taste a little different but they have just the right amount of salt and a really nice crunchy texture. I used the Santa Fe rice (a lean cuisine dinner) as dip for them and it was fabulous.

I froze the leftover cupcakes and donuts. My hope is that being frozen will stop me from eating them just because they'd spoil otherwise, and having them available to nom after thawing will stop me from spending huge amounts on binge food. 

9, 10

25 min puppy walk yesterday? I don't remember offhand

40 minutes puppy walking today

134

3 yeast donuts est 750

Breakfast burrito 270

Mozzarella 80

Mac n cheese 700

Cottage cheese & pineapple 200

(2000)

Last 3 days have been dawn to dusk nonstop running and rehearsal and trying to keep the pup happy in my free moments between. I am utterly exhausted.

Also, I had a major reaction to something in the Mac n cheese or cottage cheese and pineapple and my belly is all swollen and titght and full feeling. Wah. 

Dark choco 250

(2250)

8

133.iforget 

15 minute puppy walk

Sausage McMuffin 370

20 min puppy walk

Jalapeñoozzarella sticks 240

Southern style chicken sandwich plus cheese & mayo 580

Choco chip choco chip cookies 480

25 minute puppy walk

Rosemary veg 200

(1970)

10 minute puppy walk

(70 minutes)

PB M&Ms 100(the last of the family size bag which has lasted me the better part of a month, not that I haven't been eating other junk)

(2070)

7

15 min puppy walk

Raisin bran, dry 300

The milk smelled funny

Broccoli & cauliflower with cheese 90

20 minute puppy walk

Garlic bread 27596 cals

Mac n cheese 400

15 min puppy walk 

Mac n cheese 400

Broc cauliflower cheese 90

Total 1260 plus the garlic bread

Total 60 min puppy walk

6

Puppy walk 25 min. Poor baby, I had work and rehearsal today. I'll make it up to him tomorrow. 

Raisin bran 350

2 jalapeño mozzarella sticks 180

PB M&Ms 250

Coffee with cream 100

Rosemary veg 200

1080

Liverwurst on rye (will check cals later. 500?)

PB M&Ms 250

1830

5

133.2

40 minute puppy walk plus 20 minute puppy frolic where he zoomed in circles while I wasn't going anywhere hehe. 

**I found this saved as a draft and I'm really confused. I thought I had posted that day. Oh well. Ended up with 60 minutes puppy walking. 

4

134.2

Grande pumpkin spice latte 380 cals 52 g sugar :::weeps at sugar content:::

30 min puppy walk

 

The high is below 60 today, making it Annual Fancy Coffee Day on which I celebrate the arrival of proper fall weather. I discovered that I'm actually not that fond of pumpkin. 

30 min puppy walk

Rosemary veggies 200

Lots and lots of puffy Cheetos 1350

Pinot Grigio 200

So nutritious today lol

Est 2130 cals

60 minutes total puppy walk

3

133.8

I am cramping and spotting and angry at the world, though I have things to be angry about even if I weren't hormonal and in pain. 

2 half bun mcdoubles 700

Boxed mac n cheese 1000

Peanut butter M&Ms 250

Pino Grigio 200

Total est 2150

2

134.8

Sausage McMuffin
Chipotle ranch salad with 1/4 rotisserie chicken mmmm
Glass of Pinot Grigio (the world is pleasantly tilty right now.  Am celebrating puppy and job)
2 servings peanut butter M&Ms*
Est 1700

50 minutes puppy walking done and I plan another 20.

Puppy walking so far:

9/29 60 minutes

9/30 80 minutes

10/1 50 minutes

This is good for me :) it's not exercise (yet... He'll run with me some day) it's just getting out and moving and enjoying the furry company. It is worth all the less pleasant aspects of having a small puppy. 

*I never ate the M&Ms because I left them in the kitchen by mistake and Xander is settled in for the night and being peacefully quiet. I'm having mad chocolate peanut butter cravings but I'll just have to suck it up...**

Also, I haven't made particular fitness plans because my right knee is still sore from move day. That needs to sort itself out before I can do anything more intense than walking. 

**updated update: I was awake for a few more hours so I walked him again and got my M&Ms. Om nom. 

October 1

136

50 minutes of puppy walking. I had work and rehearsal and not enough sleep so I was simply too tired for more than that. 

Intake:

Double cheeseburger

Chocolate chip muffin

Ham & cheddar on rye

Est 1600 cals